Unlike other prerequisite reading, the bookstores can’t rob you blind on this one

February 14th, 2011 / #holidays, #observations, #valentinesday

So, having not updated WordPress for fear of mucking up the works behind-the-scenes of this website, the works got mucked supremely this weekend. On Friday, I first noticed the blank page of death. Something must have been wrong with the database.

After a few hours of exporting, importing, and general nerdery, the site is back up and looking better than ever. However, before I could walk away I had to go through and reassign hyperlinks in over seven years of posts. As I was doing this, I realized something.

If you publicly blog over a period of years, you essentially assign homework to any legitimate prospective spouse. I don’t feel I would be completely comfortable spending my life with another person if she hadn’t read my every inconsequential rambling. Long-term blogging acts as full disclosure and a way for others to see how you’ve developed over time, both academically and in terms of the opinions you hold. It’s required reading.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Happy Valentine’s Day, kids.

Pardon us while we are the best sons in the world

May 20th, 2010 / #holidays, #video

One of these days, she will figure out that I only know about 10 chords and stuff like this will stop being as adorable:

It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s… Super Tebow!

November 1st, 2009 / #holidays, #pictures, #uf

So, I’m only posting these photos here because my mom told me to. I hope the two twentysomething trick-or-treaters we got enjoyed this as much as I’m sure they enjoyed their full-size candy bars. It baffles me that word hasn’t gotten ’round the neighborhood yet that every year we have the best candy on the block, not to mention awesome pumpkins. Stupid, stupid children.

More for me.

Also, please excuse the blurry and generally terrible quality of my cell phone’s camera:

Almost as spooky as Matt Garza in game 7 of the ALCS

November 3rd, 2008 / #(devil)rays, #baseball, #holidays

I hate how this has largely become a photo blog. Hopefully I will find time to write more in the coming months.

Tricks, no treat

November 5th, 2007 / #complaints, #holidays

On Halloween night, some little kid had the gall to come up to my door sans costume and beg for candy in his pillowcase. I sent him away empty-handed.

What a little brat.

Mother's Day Showdown 2007

May 14th, 2007 / #family, #holidays

Every Mother’s Day, Mom annoys us and annoys us until we take part in her little game. See, a few years ago we all decided for some odd reason to make our own cards. Little did we know, this action set an unfortunate precedent. Now, we are required to make our own cards, year in and year out. Ideally, upon reception of these cards Mother would immediately choose a favorite, thereby signifying the favorite of her children, at least for the next year. Unfortunately, she has yet to actually pick a card.

So, I bring it to the Internet to find out who wins. (Note that I am including my card and Ian’s card; Dad forgot that we play this game, so he went to the nearest Walgreen’s and bought one. Talk about taking the coward’s way out.)

Ian’s Card: Marker on white computer paper. Reads “To the bestest Mom in the world,” with the “o” in “world” being a blue and green circle, with what appears to be two continents that don’t actually exist. Inside, written in orange, there is a poem:

“I am writing this note
Yes, it is true
Without sugar-coat:
I (heart) you!”

Below this reads “Happy Mother’s Day!!!” in green and “Love, Ian” in purple.

My Card: Construction paper cut out on a yellow backdrop. On the front reads, “To the best Mom in the world,” with “Mom” written in large red glitter atop a large pink heart in the middle of the page. Inside, there is a cutout of a white body under a red oval meant to represent a uterus. Inside is a pink fetus with a beard giving a thumbs up. From this area emanates a blue speech bubble, causing the fetus to say, “Thanks for birthing me!” To the right of this, written in orange, green, and red is, “Happy Mother’s Day 2007, (heart) Casey.”

I’m sorry that this textual representation of our artwork is the best I can offer, but sadly I haven’t yet discovered how to operate the scanner here in Clearwater. I also don’t think it would be prudent to stick glitter in there. However, I do state that my description of each card is as accurate as possible, and I don’t think it takes a genius to know who the favorite son is going to be this year.

Proud to be (a little) Irish

March 22nd, 2006 / #holidays, #music

Last week, to prepare myself for the St. Patrick’s Day holiday, I burned a CD with about thirty Irish pub songs for use in my car.

I started listening on Monday. I was still listening today, four days after the holiday. I am about to go insane, but I can’t stop.

What gets me is the fact that these Irish folks, who are presumably always drunk, can remember the eight billion words that are to be in any song and that they can spit those words back out as fast as many of these melodies require.

This is what has convinced me of the supreme greatness of Irish people: they’re always drunk, fighting, and can really drop a phat beat.

Boxing Day is only 9 months away

March 3rd, 2006 / #complaints, #holidays

If you don’t know Stefanie, she’s a family friend who stayed at my house two summers ago and sporadically since. Now, she’s living with us quasi permanently, because she has always wanted to live in Florida.

The other day, she got a couple of desktop calendars for my computer table. They’re the kind where you have to rip off a page for each day to present a new fact or trivia question. In this case, they’re Buccaneers and Major League Baseball themes.

But on to my gripe session. I never really understood these types of calendars: they sit there, reflecting 1/365 of the year while leaving you largely unenlightened about the days and weeks surrounding the single day that sits there and stares you in the face. What if it’s Boxing Day in Canada next Tuesday? How can I even begin to prepare my annual Boxing Day party if I don’t know about it until next Tuesday when I finally remember to rip off the sheets of paper that have been left untouched for a week because I forgot to bother with the whole progression of time? This, my friends, is a veritable mystery.

By the way, you’re all invited to my annual Boxing Day gala on December 26. Tell your friends and BYOB.

Well, they don't offer Baseball 101

December 14th, 2005 / #baseball, #college, #holidays

Like most of the rest of my graduating class, I got accepted into the University of Florida. So, I had to get a bunch of scholarship things taken care of yesterday as to facilitate my ability to attend.

I had to call the office of Chuck Murphy (president of the Florida State Baseball League) yesterday to see what I needed to do to get my scholarship check from the mascot gig this summer, and I got the information from his secretary.

I said goodbye, but this lady would just not stop talking. I don’t know if she felt that she had to make conversation with me to be nice or what, but this lady talked to me about everything there is to be talked about. Baseball, college, my career path, everything.

And I think that she was genuinely offended when I told her that my major is probably going to be political science.

“That doesn’t have anything to do with baseball!”

Listen lady: I’m a 5’6″, 140 pound IB student with absolutely no physical prowess. Plus, I’m a football man. And heck, there’s no money in baseball anyway.

About 10 minutes later, I was finally able to coerce her into hanging up the phone, but not until after I had spilled my life story to this complete stranger.

The holidays do some crazy things to people.

  • Who I Am

    I'm a nobody from Florida with things to say (sometimes).

  • What This Is

    This is a not-so-detailed account of my adolescence over the course of almost a decade. Here, I shared my thoughts about things of no real consequence while at the same time being reckless with semicolons and flowery language.

    I used this website to connect with folks before Facebook. Today, I sometimes chronicle interesting thoughts and observations I have. I don't update as much as I should.

  • Colophon

    This soapbox is powered by WordPress 3.0.5. The theme is inspired by Randa Clay's Bluebird.