The Return of the Clapper

December 26th, 2005 / #awesomeness, #christmas

If you recall, last Christmas I told you about the greatest Christmas gift I had ever received or ever would receive. Santa gave me my Clapper, and all was right with the world.

What I didn’t tell you, however, was the perilous tale of how I managed to break my Clapper mere weeks after getting it. A word to the wise: never vacuum with your Dirt Devil plugged into a Clapper. It’ll work, but as you get closer and closer to the electrical outlet, the Clapper mistakes the moaning and groaning of the vacuum for innocent bouts of applause, causing the vacuum cleaner to turn on and off so much that the fuses and electronic components of the Clapper end up fried. In honor of Clapper #1′s memory, therefore, I have refused to clean my carpet for a year. It would be too traumatic.

This Christmas, though, I got a replacement Clapper. I have yet to hook it up to anything, though I think I’ll just put it on my lava lamp and this neon Corona Extra sign that my Mom stole from a bar for me.

The point of this story, though, is that Santa did it once again. Right when I thought that nothing could be worse because I had to undertake the arduous task of flipping a switch to turn on my lamp, good ole Chris Cringle came through in the clutch to brighten my life. And for that, I am forever grateful.


There are 3 comments. Such a lively discussion!

  1. Vince spoke up on December 29, 2005.

    To a man you are so grateful towards, you could at least take the liberty of spelling his name properly: Kris Kringle.

  2. Casey spoke up on December 29, 2005.

    Vince totally got me. I admit it.

    Plus, what would a day be like if Vinny didn’t try to correct something (everything) I say?

  3. Maria spoke up on January 11, 2006.

    We bought a clapper before christmas to plug the tree into. New Years eve we had some friends round and had great fun seeing who could turn the tree on & off from the greatest distance. I was the clear winner, much to the disgust of all the men who found it hard to accept that a mere slip of a girl (well I am only 27) could clap louder than them.

Sorry, but comments are closed. Some things are best said in a vacuum.

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