Maybe he should hang out with John Edwards at some locale other than Fantastic Sam’s

Random political observation: This Blagojevich fellow needs to ditch the 14 year-old boy haircut. He looks too much like a quarterback for the Crimson Tide.

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Where can I pick up my commemorative Barack Obama pogs?

Oh, Barack Obama.

It must be pretty comforting to know that after your Presidency is complete in eight years, you will have quite a source of income based solely on your image. Think about the possibilities, dude. When you leave Washington to go back and farm corn or whatever it is those in Illinois do, you can simply live for the rest of your life by selling stuff with your face all over it to the legions of Americans who think you are Jesus.

I’m talking about an action figure line, maybe some designer clothes at Wal-Mart a la the Olsen Twins, maybe even a blockbuster action film!

Seeing the countless racks of wares with your (likely unlicensed) image throughout the last few months, I have come to the conclusion that this whole Presidency thing is more of a time killer until you can evolve from the prince of politics into the messiah of the marketplace.

Barack Obama t-shirts, Barack Obama stationary, Barack Obama DVDs, and Barack Obama salad dressing to take the place of Newman’s Own. Heck, it’s only a matter of time (read: a month) until kids start showing up to school with Barack Obama valentines for all of their good friends. The possibilities are endless!

Bitter? No. I just wish people would pay to have my face on crap.

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Yet Another Post About Taco Bell

All right, it’s been about a month since I have complained to the Internet about something trivial that shouldn’t even cross my mind, so here we go. People need to learn how to say “Taco Bell.”

Taco Bell is delicious. And wildly inexpensive. Therefore, it is a popular food choice amongst my peers. However, many of them seem it necessary to put an extra emphasis on the “a” in “taco.”

Listen, folks. It’s just two words. Say, “taco.” Good. Now say, “bell.” All right, now put them together. There is the name of your eating establishment.

It’s not like we’re comparing bells. If I were to say, “Gee, I like the food at Burger Bell, not Taco Bell,” then such an emphasis on the first word would be necessary. But you know what? There is only one bell in my life and it will remain this way for at least the foreseeable future.

Now, if I could just teach people how to properly say “hotel” and “insurance.”

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