Bologna

Posted on 04.06.04 4:18PM in bad grammar, random

Merriam Webster defines it as “a large smoked sausage of beef, veal, and pork; also : a sausage made (as of turkey) to resemble bologna.” And I would agree – its bologna.

But it’s pronounced “baloney.” Come to think of it, Merriam Webster also defines such a word in that whimsical book of theirs: “pretentious nonsense : BUNKUM — often used as a generalized expression of disagreement.”

So, what we have on our hands here are two different words! Up until five minutes ago, I thought it was “bologna” in all contexts. Like, for example, when that Flick character on A Christmas Story argues with Shwartz about the notion that his tongue would stick to the flagpole, he cries (phonetically), “BALL-OH-NEE!” For sixteen years I always thought it would have to have been written “bologna” in the script, and for sixteen years I thought that such a spelling would be outrageously aesthetically unpleasing. Now I have been shown the light.

But what about other uses of bologna, not necessarily relating to pretentious nonsense? Admit it, it’s a funny word, but you’re telling me, Mr. Webster, that I’m supposed to spell it like you say even when I know full well that’s not how it sounds? When one uses the word “bologna” in somewhat humorous ways, I find that it takes away from the comedy when one spells it as if it were a deli meat.

So, here I am, submitting that whenever we aren’t talking about meat or a city in Italy, we spell it “baloney.”

QED

Read Comments

  1. Posted by Angus on 10.15.05 at 14:44:34

    aesthetically unpleasing? pretentious?

    casey, i think you have reached that point in life when you look for places to use big words

  2. Posted by Joey G on 10.15.05 at 14:44:52

    i have proof that mr. webster is crazy in his ways. just look at the oscar meyer song. how could a song about balony’s name be wrong. especially such a nifty (and i use this word with uncurbed enthusiasm) jingle be wrong. i end my case.

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