Smarter than the average bear
[ 2 Comments ] Posted on 06.14.04 in high school, random
I remember one day during this last school year, as I was walking through the courtyard at school I overheard these kids and they said I looked like a bear.
Roar.
I suck.
[ 2 Comments ] Posted on 05.30.04 in random
Taryn yelled at me the other day and said I was neglecting those of you with no lives, so after a week, here’s the token entry.
Actually, I haven’t been slaying you with my unceasing wit because I’m a very busy man. I started driving school on Tuesday. I get up early in the morning so I can go stand outside (not in a car, the school can only afford nine) for 4 hours until 12. Having so much time to converse with the good folks there, I have come to many conclusions:
If I were a circus animal, I would want to be a tiger.
If I could kill someone with any garden tool, it would be a rake. Not those hard, pitchfork types, but the kind made of flimsy aluminum as to perpetuate the dying process.
Cones are retarded.
Wow, that’s not many conclusions at all. I’m really, really not in the mood to write. I think I’m gonna go now. Sorry to disappoint.
Death by Mouse
[ No Comments ] Posted on 05.19.04 in random
I’m home alone this Saturday night because my mom went to a funeral party.
Funeral party? Seems rather abstract. Someone dies, so you invite all of your best friends over to boogie down. I love it.
In fact, when I die I request, nay, demand that my funeral be held at Chuck-e-Cheese. I realize the games are worse there than say, Celebration Station, but they serve beer there. I wouldn’t want to deny anyone their God-given right to drink themselves into a painless stupor following the death of a dear friend. In fact, to maintain the quazi-cheerfulness of the occasion, it’ll be a costume funeral. That’s right, no one gets in without a minimum of dyed hair and a silly hat. So if you’re a crabby McGee who won’t play, you can stay out of my funeral and hang out at the Burlington Coat Factory next door. Party pooper.