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Four Strings of Pure Sex
It took me 19 years to come to terms with the fact that I have small hands; hands so small, in fact, that I can’t really aspire to become a world class guitarist to make girls like me. So, I’m making the best of the unpleasantness of my outrageously tiny hands and learning to play the mandolin. It’s like a guitar, only smaller and with four strings.
So, I guess that would be attractive to some girls, right? Maybe little midget women or something.
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Down The Road by Mac McAnally
You did it. You actually did it. Was it as satisfying as you thought it would be?
[...] 1.For some reason, the Web site was acting up for about a month. I kept putting it off and putting it off, but I decided to fix it. Hooray for WordPress themes and the spare time to play around with the code therein. 2.I gave a homeless man playing the accordion a dollar today outside of the grocery store. I usually don’t do that kind of thing, but Dude has no eyes. So, me being the double-eyeball-having kind of guy I am, I felt guilty. On second thought, though, I could have just taken all the money from his jar. Dude has no eyes. 3.Final exams are few and far between. This is nice, but it is also kind of convenient, since I’m sitting here like a lump for days at a time while I wait for the next test to start. 4.I tried to learn the mandolin. Apart from a few songs and chords, that endeavor is playing second fiddle to my new passion: weightlifting. I originally thought that playing the mandolin would attract girls. Now, they tell me it’s lifting weights. I’m just waiting for that to go out of style and make way for a new pastime. Sort of like the blessed transition from baseball cards to Pogs. (By the way, I know I am very weak. I can curl 40 whole pounds!) 5.I gave up drinking soda, and am proud to say that as of today, it’s been four glorious, decaffeinated weeks. I am dying to have an orange soda. [...]
[...] you’ll recall, I tried learning the mandolin. I learned a few chords and things, but this attempt for love was born in futility. I [...]
[...] you’ll recall, I tried learning the mandolin. I learned a few chords and things, but this attempt for love was born in futility. I [...]
[...] that endeavor is playing second fiddle to my new passion: weightlifting. I originally thought that playing the mandolin would attract girls. Now, they tell me it’s lifting weights. I’m just waiting for that to go out of style [...]